The confused little thing, the Heart.

At my age, I don't think I could simply fall for a crush. Crush is so 16 year old.

This little thing that does the thinking, stronger than the brain could. It is the heart. It is weird.

I may think that I don't get attracted easily, but my heart says otherwise. Now I am in denial. Things are complicated if I follow what my heart feels.

But at the same time, I want to accept the feelings that my little heart created.

I am not that young. Please my little heart. I need security. I need a love that last.

Funny You're the Broken One, but I'm the One who Needed Saving....

A line from "Stay" by Rihanna.

Funny that I deeply feel your pain. Funny that I still hope that you feel, that I am the one feeling your pain, sincerely.

For I have loved a man. For I who begged Allah to cure him. I begged that he find new doors out there.

My prayers have been heard. He got away from one pain. He walked away from me. But at least he found happiness.

He is now in so much pain. Allah, soothe him please. Although I want that he feels different about me, but I know I am not much of the shoulder that he wants to cry on.

Funny that after all the times we are apart, I still feel him. I still feel his pain. For I have loved a man, and I still....

I am writing again. Signs of worklife being empty....

I have not written a single word since the day I fell hard on someone. But I did scribble a little.

So I am back. I will write again. There are just too many changes have been happening the past two years. I wish to utter everything that pained me so much, but deciding to let go seems like the saner choice.

I do not have a happy life. And there I should stop complaining.