It's just some crazy feeling....it's just your heart healing...

i have left the place that had given me so much joy & pain. and now i am creating new kind of pain. self inflicted as usual.

i have a fickle heart. i was so in love, for God know what reason. but then again, now i believe in God's power, where your heart can be turned 360...or at least right now, just 180.

i must tell myself, people like me don't stand a chance. it's better that way. i hate to fall in love again.

here's the thing. he might just be my rebound. he's nice, a gentleman, he's cute, he's funny, he's smart....well he jokes in a smart way. he's everything that never was with the one with the same name.

owh yeah, they have the same name. how irony is that?

but, i don't stand a chance. im just too ugly.

see, with all these talk about the importance of inner beauty, faith, or whatever crap that does not have to do with your physical look, no one ever looked at me beyond my fat ass and chubby face. no guy ever......

all i know, i need to shed 40kg off my body for people to notice me...

it's ok. i'm good. all i want to be is a good person. at least i make myself feel good.