looking for a brighter day...

i have eft blogging for five months now. guess it's time to restart. yeah RESTART! because i am restarting my career. after FOUR years.....four bloody years. loved some part of the four years. hating it at the same time.

i have enough of back stabbing, 'air-conditioning' (this is a term in Malay which is equivalent to Mengipas), ass-kissing, which all of the above i am not capable to.

you would be disappointed if you were in my shoes. trust me....it took a lot of thinking, juggling, another round of thinking and observing before i made this move.

i move to another department. yeah, some might say no difference. for me; it's a huge DIFFERENCE. another sets of character you need to adjust to. another type of boss you need to learn how to please. another building, further from my dear friends.

but i still feel there will be some things that are still the same. Politics. The shits you can never get rid off.

frankly, i worry that i will regret this. but i must make sure i don't retire here.....damn, i don't want to be those people. i am afraid that i don't have what it takes to be a superstar in the new place. but then again, i really had enough of misery, minus the good friends (and foes)....

it's a love hate relationship. loved the job, loved some people, HATED THE BOSS. yeah, it might sound selfish. but i need to come to work happy, damn it, i was not that happy before.

and yes, i might have to take a few more years to go up a notch. nope, i don't plan to stay a few more years....i am 27. i am young. this is the time for me to explore other businesses, other industries, broaden my knowledge (sounds cliche, i know).

i pray to Allah; if this is a wrong choice that you made me choose, maybe it is a test. I will open heartedly take it, but please Ya Allah, open up another 1001 doors for me.